346 days in...
This year has been an emotional road trip, one that has taken me through many two-lane roads and open highways of feeling and experience. I have crested long and tall hills and taken in the spectacular vistas at their zenith. I have swerved and careened through turns both fun and fearful. I have felt the subtle vibration of all cylinders pumping at optimal momentum,… and I have felt the sense of relief of idling at an intersection, contemplating which direction to take next.
This road trip has taken me through many darkened roads, some blanketed by starless nights. Other roads were illuminated by waxing and waning moons serenaded by shimmering stars and iridescent wisps of clouds aglow with city lights and setting suns. I have traversed through winter woods and gardens of spring, through summertime’s twilights and colorful winds of autumn.
I have taken roads never traveled to find my way back to old stomping grounds and back to comforting souls. People who not only shaped and influenced my past, but have helped reorient — even redefine my present and my way forward.
And on a day such as this, in my rear view mirror I shift my focus from what is behind me to what is in the mirror itself. In the finger prints and mysterious smudges of every day life pressed on that glass, I see courage. Because nearly a year ago I turned the key and the engine started, cold and shivering, reticent and unwilling. I tapped the gas, released the brake, and engaged the gears to begin the drive.
The roads were always there, countless roads, roads undiscovered or unknown but always pointing me on to places where I could go, where I could be, and just be who I am. And these roads all had signs that not only counted the cost of the miles and the wear and tear. They directed me into becoming someone more than who I’ve been, something different than what I once was. Not to the expense of it all, but actually building on the best of it all.
9 days out…
This year has been an emotional road trip with spiritual destinations, divine guideposts, and an eternal outlook that I’ve never been able to see before. At least, not like I can now, not like this.
And every single soul who has touched me, listening to my plaintive heart and the shades of my distress, have somehow willfully hopped into the shotgun seat for part of the journey, taking out the map, and giving me the directions that keep me on the right road. Within all the colorful lines and graphs, numbers and dots emerging from the cartography of their own experience and wisdom, they have seen me through so far, this far.
And what amazes me most? Knowing they’re ready to hop in again at a moments notice to help me continue on this ride.
That’s what I see in my rear view mirror: Courage. All the courage and grit, pain and resolve from these beautiful people that has filled my drive, guided my way, and reminded me that the journey is always worth it.
We are never defined by the worst destinations in our journey. Nor is the journey itself defined by the worst experiences along the way, by lost expectations or even unreachable hopes.
Whatever defines our journey, it is the company we keep – and the love that we let in – that emboldens our courage to reach our divine destination…
2021 is soon behind me.
I press on to what is ahead.
Photo Credit: Lydia Cranford All content, including text, images, and other elements Copyright © 2021 Joel Cranford
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